A Struggle

Doubt. The sermon today spiraled around the word doubt ( among other thoughts).

Doubt. That sense of uncertainty. How we all want certainty. I want a place to land—not a spot where my shoe sinks in, but solid ground.

Yet, often the only answer is one that lacks certitude.

I doubt that is so. Hedging your bets?

Prove it to me. Show me in black and white. A one time baseball player for the Boston Red Sox refused to believe that dinosaurs existed because he had never seen one. He doubted the validity of the found skeletons.

I know someone who grew up in a religious family, a family filled with missionaries. She married someone who held the same beliefs. Despite a Phi Beta Kappa key she leaned toward a rigid belief in the formation of the world outlined in Genesis. She could quote vast portions of scripture and kept up a running conversation with God. She truly believed and acted upon her faith.

One day we attended a talk given by a Pentecostal minister at a local Baptist Church. The only thing missing from the talk was snake handling. When we left the church we both agreed that the minister eschewed all of science. If it wasn't in the Bible—it couldn't be true.

Getting in the car, Anna said, " Sometimes I wonder if it all isn't magical thinking."

Doubt, we agreed, may be the most important ingredient in faith. We rely on trusting God and take a step into a void and find solid footing.

I'm always frightened of people who never grapple with doubt.